Don't

Dont shine in my face;

Dont chirp in my ears;

Dont tick so fast;

Dont talk so loud;

eyes sting...hands tremble...feet numb....

Let me sleep...i need some sleep....ive GOT to SLEEP!!!

Met up with my school friends after a good five year haul….surprisingly, not much has changed…by which I mean that our goofysms continue to prevail! :)

Not everybody could make it to our adda, the mighty CP, but there we were...all sinister 13 of us.

Managed to get enough space in dear ol’ café coffee day….and the fun began as soon as we planted ourselves on the…well….not so plush couches, and the staid chairs…but who gave a damn!! We were meeting after FIVE years and there was other stuff to think about than the comfort of our backside!!! ;)

A round of sandwiches, coffees and lemon ice teas, our tongues loosen up a bit and the gup-shup begins…yes, we springdalians are chronic gossip-mongers innit?! ;) (YEEEAAHH)

Thirteen (re)introductions and a lot more “confessions” into the evening and we get ready for the foto sessions…more gossip…teasing Salil…



A week later, and i sit here, reminiscing about the days when basketball and canteen trips ruled our world…


Kriti : My darling baby…hasn’t changed a BIT…as loopy as ever :) aaj kal she’s in the ‘oil’ business! :D

Nishank : I remember how he struggled through his…ahem… portly days and then blossomed into a beautiful butterfly (hehehehe). The way he used to count calories in the canteen-made patties!!! “aaloo?? ARE U CRAZYYY??? pata hai isme 589 calories hain!!! Cant have this yaar…tooooooo fattening!!” after a year of this too-oily-cant-eat-this phase, his tummy went in and he got this crazed out concave shape!!! Cut to 2006, and a stint in France, our dear MBA bwoy looks much better ;) Have fun in Nice kid, and don’t forget to bring back that shiney disco ball!

Salil : Sal – The math wiz!!!! His definition of ‘single’ – could be going around…but not married! Dude…ure the DON!!! ;)

Gauri: My most vivid and best memories of ours are of the innumerous hours we spent on the BB courts!! Man! The slightest of chances and we were there, dribbling away to glory! Betting on 21 shots with varun, and then making him treat us to pepsi!! Uh…btw, Gaur u HAVENT put on any xtra weight! ;) hehehehehe Babe! U looked just fine…specially the second chin…!! Salsa classes huh?? Nice….sign me up yaar!

Tanuj : The original “Rock” man!! ;) he taught us how to do the rock eyebrow lift…there was a proper muscle training that we had to undergo, serious stuff!! Remember all those extra classes with MOM Bakshi?…damn! Chemistry padh-padh ke dimaag hil jaata tha!!
Dude! U remain as huggable as ever!! :)

Perseus : Ah! Percy…cute, witty, and grey cells oozing even from his nails!! The little goatie was ADORABLE man!! Our Singapore plan stands! ;)

Arun: How could u NOT have a crush in school?????? Damn! Bwoy…weren’t there enough hotties in dear ol’ SPS?

Mansi: doctor saab!! Ure gonna do us proud aren’t u? :) good going girl! Although im a little surprised that u still have all ur body parts intact! There wasn’t a single day in school that Mansi Sharma had seen through without having bumped into a few tables and/or chairs, and spilling ink on her shirt. :) Had so much fun in the Biology lab, dissecting those cockroaches, borrowing blood and spit from each other! ;)

Shobit: Ah! The big business man! He sits in café coffee day as if he were in a board meeting cracking a deal for his next hotel! :) dude, we’ll get discounts right??

Anchal Batra: The quite, reticent person who very rarely got ruffled up at anything. Now, five years later, she remains as pretty, calm and contained! Your birthday parties rocked, girl!!! Ummm…padhai khatam ho gayi? ;)

Varun Grover: He was quite a hunk in school days, and im happy to say that he still is…more so!!! ;)

Aanchal Kapoor: The i-don’t-give-a-damn-what-others-think attitude…that was and IS Aanchal for u! The forever effervescent girl with that infectious laugh…Babe!! U make the most morbid of moments seem bright and nice!! We wouldn’t have met had it not been for ya! (so when do the auditions begin?? Mujhe bhi toh star ban na hai! hehehe)

Btw, sorry people for the horde of (mis)information that I provided, but it was ALL varun wadhwa’s fault!!!! Sigh! Wat can I say?? You just cant trust the grapewine anymore these days!!! ;) So, the guys can breathe easy for the time being!!!!

Had a wonderful time that day…more than a reunion it was a reminder of all the good times we had back then…An evening well spent…An effort well made!

SPS RULEZZZZZZZ!!!!!!! :)

Fender's American Stratocaster

No memory of a caress...just the sweet warmth of your voice....and a face in my dreams...

scissor hands

Last week was one of those times when life was just NOT on track! There were few, and I mean very few, things that went my way. One of the whole lotta things that DIDN'T, was….my hair!!!!

Ive always had short hair that just about used to fall on my shoulders, and it’s the thin wavy type that immediately curl up when subjected to humid conditions, and lemme tell ya that delhi has enough of that…humid conditions that is!! In fact, a friend once even said that my hair was like maggi noodles!!! And unless chemically treated there is hardly any way to straighten them up. But that’s the lesser of the evils that I have to deal with!
Now, ive been trying to grow my hair since early this year, and usually I have very little patience for long hair…all the regular combing, brushing, washing, conditioning, and tying up!!! Its just a little bit more TLC than what my hair is normally used to! But anyhow, I sustained and the hair has been growing steadily since then….thank you very much! :)

But all the hard work was crushed to crumbs this last week!! here is what happened….after a thorough head wash, I decided to funk up my style! (yep!! And it only gets worse!)
So, I pulled out a tremendously undersized pair of scissors (the only pair I had lying nearby…I figured if I went finding a better one I’d give up the whole idea!). Now, these are the ones that fold to the size of a coin and you have to hold them very carefully with only your thumb and forefinger for help, and squint so that you know where to cut!! I know, I know, but damn! My hands were working faster than my brains could think!!! So, anyway, I pulled out the latest issue of a fashion mag and zeroed in on a photo of a pretty model (who btw had straight, beautiful, silky hair) and decided that I’ll give myself a nice fringe like hers.
That done, I separated a few hundred strands of hair above my forehead and very, very carefully (or so I thought) measured the length I wanted. I took the scissors (which, I now saw, were also rusted) and painstakingly started cutting, and it took about thirty odd strokes before the left over hair fell to the ground, and the rest remained, dangling, just a few inches above the bridge of my nose. Not sure about the outcome I hesitantly looked into the mirror to witness my handiwork…..AND….immediately realized what a GROSS mistake I had made!!!! The fringe lay on my forehead...sure….in an awkward SLANT!!!!! There’s more….once the hair dried, it curled up into several tiny wire springs, all of different sizes, jutting out of my head in all directions….as if I was struck by lightening….and I don’t mean the romantic kind that the god of love throws your way, but the real thing…the one with voltage!!!!!!

Ever since then it pains me to stand in front of the mirror everyday and witness the aftermath of the massacre I have caused…and this is the physical, emotional, ‘I cant show my face in public’ kinda pain!!!! Not much of a handiwork after all!!!

Sigh!! What can I say….my impulsiveness has given me more grief than this!!!And I now know that there is a reason why barbers don’t cut their own hair….and im not even close to being one….a barber tht is!!! :-s

'love is like a horse carriage ride....after a while u realise that u r cold and staring at a huge ass tht craps in front of u!!! ...
LOVE......is a crapping horse!!!!'
-will of 'will n grace' :)

o lord which art in me! i pray to thee to give me strength so i can wake up each morning and live another day....and be happy to have done that!

Im reading Dominique Lapierre’s ‘is New York burning?’ these days. The plot is being set to plant a nuke in the heart of NYC. The plan is the brainchild of some of the world’s most wanted terrorists, including the kingpin Osama himself, who is heading this ‘jihad’ against the ‘land of satan’ and the ‘infidel Bush’!!
One of the instigators of this holy war is another person, the right hand man of Saddam! He is here to avenge the soul and spirit of Saddam, who will soon begin degenerating in an American cell as a POW!!
Here, the aim of planting the bomb is to make the American prez to get the Israelies to remove their illegal settlements in Palestine, and also, of course, to take revenge for the thousands of muslims killed there!!

So that was what the plot is all about…and it got me to thinking that Osama’s Al qaeda and other similar organizations pursuing the path to allah, are fundamentally struggling to achieve a single goal….to protect the muslim cult all over the world!! I mean all that the man wants is for the rest of the world to treat the children of allah with due respect just as any other human is entitled to! And to attain that, he is willing to blow up an entire city full of innocent people…many of whom are not even American!!

But this was not what I was trying to get at!! What im saying, after careful introspection, is that in life one has to struggle, persevere and be resilient, to say the least!!! But does this effort…this struggle, mean anything if the cause is not just??? On the other hand what may seem just and relevant to you might not actually be so for the others!! In which case, would your strive account for anything at all?? Or would you go ahead anyway and not care a rat’s ass about the others???!!

Osama’a cause is supported by millions of subjugated muslims in Afghanistan, Iraq, and Palestine. People who are consumed with unadulterated abhorrence towards the American president for waltzing into their country and annihilating it and as a consequence wiping off their homes and the meaning of their meager lives!!! So, what most of us denounce as the act of a vile and sick man, is actually the act of the messiah himself, for these poor people!!

Ps: before you rush to hound me down and kill me, let me say that the above written does not mean that I support the Bin Laden clan. Nor should this imply that im trying to justify his actions and his means of revenge. What I am validating is his cause and I support that!!

love is complicated.....it makes life easy

Summer evenings during childhood were all about breaking out the door of our house and rushing into the garden as soon as the clock ticked 5!

Mine was a cheerful neighbourhood with plenty of kids. So finding people to play hide ‘n’ seek, cricket, pitthu, basketball…was never a problem.

But our all time favourite thing to do was to fetch raw mangoes from the huge mango tree in our backyard!! It had been there ever since I could remember, and most certainly long before that too.
It grew every year.... getting taller, standing there with an almost majestic pride, dutifully serving us with perfectly shaped green, crisp, zingy mangoes season after season after season.

Unfortunately none of us possessed the agility nor skill to climb the height of the tree and pluck the fruit with our bare hands.... so we relied on our (ahem!) aim….a la sholay ishtyle!! :) so whoever could mark the fruit with a stone, stick or a shoe and break it, would be given the much sought after title of “nishaanebaaz”!! :) (cant remember if I ever got one though…sigh!)

We loved that big old mountain of a tree….but it royally pissed us all off when the number of ‘reachable’ mangoes would begin to trickle down to barely a handful…coz that would sign an end to our quest…as we couldnt possibly reach the rest of the sinfully delicious fruits!!! (and the worst part was…we knew they weren’t sour!!! :-s )

Well, all that changed a few seasons later when the summers gave way to an unusually raucous monsoon!! And on one fateful day when the ground couldn’t take it any more and the roots were already weak enough…a thunderous storm finally dislodged the withering hulk!

We kids had a field day snatching all the pretty green babies as fast as our tiny hands could go…fearing that if we dint hurry, they would begin to rot!!

But once the feast was over it dint take long for us to begin missing that ol’ mammoth of a king!! The storm had unknowingly brought with it an end to an era of finger licking yummy mango chutnies, pickles, papads, rassams and other mouth watering dishes…which used to be the highlight of our yearly summer holiday cuisine!! No cool shade in the blistering heat…no tangy fragrance…no rustling of dried leaves…and god!! no strong branches to hang our swings!!!! Yup….we sure missed the entire span of him!

Although ma did try to fill the void by planting a gulmohar, but the damned thing shed like a dog and was soon removed!! And since then no other has ever taken the place of the royal leader.

The empty space still gapes at me and reminds me of the times long gone….

how high can you fly with broken wings......Life's a journey not a destination......And I just can't tell just what tomorrow brings...

i cant tell u why...

Why is it that there exist two sets of distinct rules? …one that applies to u…and one that is applicable to others, according to u!!

It is so convenient to opine and be the better person when you r the “other” person… righteous, unbiased, practical and conclusive. But what happens when the time comes to apply the same convention to your own self? Suddenly, the paradigm shifts…because obviously we are here just to preach what is right…the "practice" part is not for us to follow up…after all if we do everything what will be left for the others?

love - yet again

really! so wat is love all about?

whn do u know tht u have been actually hit by the most famous emotional bomb?
and does it really live up to the expectations of all the eager, hot blooded young men and women?

the dewey eyes of the petite juliet looking down at the handsome and fearless face of romeo, embarking towards the road of eternal love and devotion – till death do them part…well death did come and they ended up fading into the mist of history...

the passion tht had Helen and paris in the grips of rapture so strong that they were ready to take on the wrath of two great cities, and their ruthless emperors…and yet, after 10 years of historical drama, helen was “reinstated” where she rightly belonged…in troy…back to being just a figure of speech… the face that launched a thousand ships!

Keats’ ‘ la belle dame sans merci’ (the beautiful lady without mercy), forced the hero into believing that he had fallen in love with the human externalization of Aphrodite herself…leading him to wander aimlessly in the scorching deserts, searching for her, going without food and water for days together, finally losing his mind, and dying!

Three of the innumerous myths about love, three of the greatest sagas’ of love, and all three ending in tragedy!

Does that give us some hint about love? Does it mean that falling completely, and mindlessly in love, only leads to unfulfillment of life, per se?

Or , does it mean that this love, is such a thing that just falling in it is enough for a human to forgo everything else…that just a few moments spent being truly in love, can facilitate one to live the rest of one’s life…alone...happy and content with just the memories of what had once been?!

Is this the reason why only a few lucky ones have the privilege to experience this mighty gift of our god?

When, I ask my lord, will I be able to let go of myself to another person? someone who will take my very soul in his tender hands and wrap it up with his own….for eternity….

Ah! Heavenly bliss, thy name is... true love!

godsmack - vampires!

few creature of the night have caught our imagination like the vampires..
what explains our enduring fascination with vampires?
what is it about the vampire myth that explains our interests?
is it the overtone of sexual lust, power and control?
Or is it a fascination with the immortality of the undead?
And what dark and hidden parts of our psyche are aroused and captivated
by the legends of the undead,
The mystery of the undead will continue to fascinate the living.

sometimes u get into somethin coz u know tht u will not achieve a conclusion....and tht  seems like the best way out, but what u realise later is tht it just screwed up ur life even more!!
 
how many time does it take for ur life to give u a kick in ur jaws before u take in tht life, in fact, is not for u to understand!
 
u spend ur waking moments trying to get over the rotten past so tht u have somethin concrete to hold on to in the future.....but wat do u do whn the past has weaved itself into ur very veins and every now and thn whn life seems a little better, it jolts u into remembering it!
 
how do u plan ur life whn ur mind is only full of uncertainties?......how do u live ur life whn u have no plan?????

coincidence

somtimes u think of something, and its just a chance shot that somebody has also had the same brain wave! now, what would u call this? fate, destiny, or just a mere coincidence? well, for some it mite jus be a fluke, but for me, i think its a way of god telling us that there is a connection between the two! or as i would rather call it, "god-whispers"!! (rest later, coz the lab ass. is standin on my head to shut down the damn comp!!) :)

waiting time!!

i was sitting on the railway platform, waiting for the train to arrive which, as i should have expected, was 2hrs late! and now i had all this time and not much to do, so i sat on this weary, iron bench and read, even though my mind was distracted...distracted by the indelible but regular announcements made by a strange, succinct voice over the telecom. this was the time i realised that here, on this platform, came together people from different stratas of life. there were people waiting, sitting on the benches, lying on the ground, in the insufferable delhi heat, and some were just walking up and down, wishing that some rail-god (read as, minister) would come and change the godforsaken condition of the dilapidated house of trains!!

as i pause to listen to the latest announcement, i feel the first pangs of hunger but hold myself for the fear of catching some dysentry disease.......belatedly i realise that the broadcasted information was of no consequence to me, and i get back to imagining what lives the people around me led.

by this time a cool breeze, unnatural for this time of the month, had started wisping, and a young boy hummed some folk tune which, somehow, managed to make the drumming of the train wheels sound as the rhythm to his slow song.

as i fail to keep my "train" of thought on its "track", i wonder how in BLUE BLAZES can anybody manage to sleep admist the blaring sounds of the trains' sirens and the intermitent noise of the vocal information booming from the loudspeaker, marked by the avoidable and absolutely unnecessary 'ding-dongs'!!! :) and yet there were families lying on the ground sleeping as if there were no tomorrow.

as the hunger threatens to reach its peak, i find myself cursing the delayed train, and more so, the woman making the announcements, who very easily found it in her capacity to apologise for every individual delay and cancellation that occured on this fateful day , as if it were her own fault and by her regretting for it would really make a difference for the person who has already been waiting for the goddam train for over an hour now!! i mean, LADY, get real or GO FISH!!

a train arrived, no not the one that i was waiting for, but a train none the less.
a little girl, standing with her father, waiting expectedly, rushed towards the coach which was apparantly carrying her mother. the glow of happiness that etched her face, when her mommy appeared, was what dreams are made up of. paving her way through the mushrooming crowd of coolis and passengers, the girl rushed into the waiting arms of her mother.
the affectionate intensity of that embrace was like a breath of fresh air for me, who had all but lost it, waiting!!

continuing to sit on the increasingly uncomfortable bench, being pushed into submitting to my hunger, i am still on tenterhooks, steadily reaching the end of my tether and silently mumbling profanities to anybody who was even remotely connected with the railway administration!!!

"may i have your attention please, the friggin train that you are waiting for is running late. i know you are sitting on the platform, hungry and uncomfortable, loosing it by the second, while i am in an airconditioned room making these nonsensical announcements, and being paid for it! the inconvinience is deeply regretted!" DING-DONG!

FATE

Fate is the power looked upon as controlling all events!!

It as a way of altering the road of life;
It knows everything...it has lived everything;

It has given tears to a widowed mother;
And inflicted pain on a heartbroken lover.

Fate makes u rise and is the cause of ur fall;
But u believe in it and so do we all.

Fate beckons u to keep going even though
it was the one to make u stop;
Fate gives u the power to decide,
to harvest ur own crop!

BELIEVE

Believe in yourself, for what you live;
Believe in charity, your power to give;

Believe in the sunset, for "everything tht goes up must come down";
Believe in love as "it makes the world go round";

Believe in truth even though it may be tough;
Believe in living even though the road of life is rough;

Believe, that sadness is a passing phase,
and that happiness is like the sun shining through the misty haze!!